


Bramata Pax - Craved Peace

by Annabeth_Granger1_Efp



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: F/M, Hanji's centric, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Major spoilers for chapter 132, The ship is minor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-05
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:47:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26301427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Annabeth_Granger1_Efp/pseuds/Annabeth_Granger1_Efp
Summary: “Dedicate your heart.” he almost whispers, but it sounds like a promise yelled in the heavy, mortal air.And she snorts.
Relationships: Levi/Hange Zoë
Comments: 4
Kudos: 85





	Bramata Pax - Craved Peace

**Author's Note:**

> As said in the tags, major spoilers for chapter 132 (or, rather, the leaks of this chapter).
> 
> Happy Birthday, my queen! This one is for you.

" _I can't give up... I can't give up_."

That has been her mantra since the first time she fought against those titans she has been studying for almost all of her life. And now her mind blasts it on repeat, louder and louder, blood coursing through her veins, heart beating fast.

She needs time. Everyone needs it, and if she has to be the one to save it for the others, for the remaining hope of humanity, she will accept the heavy task.

A part of her curses Floch for his _perfect_ timing, but she knows she must remain focused, now more than ever.

The plane demands repairs as soon as possible, but the seconds are ticking.

“So, that’s how it is, huh? See ya, everyone!” she jokingly voices, though her eye reflects the true burden those words hold. 

Everyone looks at her skeptically at first, that is, until her finger points at the blond boy in front of her.

“Oh, Armin, Levi is now your underling. Feel free to boss him around as much as you like!” she teases, grinning at her short companion, who meets her smile with one of the most serious expressions she has ever seen on him ‒ and that’s saying something.

The blond is just surprised, especially after comprehending the connotation of Hanji’s words. The others aren’t less taken aback, except, well, him.

“Hey, Shitty Four-Eyes.” Levi calls out before she has the chance to storm off, the gaze in his icy blue eyes not hiding completely how hurt he is.

They are the only ones who are still alive among the oldest Survey Corps members. And he is destined to remain there last.

“You know, don’t you, Levi? My time has finally come. I want to put on a cool act!” she smiles, almost reassuringly, and the man before her can’t really understand how she is able to smirk in that moment, but he isn’t surprised either. That’s who Hanji is. 

At the same time, he knows her too well by now, and he can see how her usually warm brown eye is now duller, sadder. Full of pain. 

“Please, let me go.” she continues, the plea sad but still so firm it couldn’t be refuted.

He then squares her, a blanket of sadness covering his features. One foot after another, he approaches her, at first with his head jerked up.

“Dedicate your heart.” he almost whispers, but it sounds like a promise yelled in the heavy, mortal air.

And Hanji snorts. Yes, she has the audacity to giggle. Her laughter bubbles out before she can contain it, while Levi doesn’t really know if he should roll his eyes, barely smile or reprimand that ‘Shitty Four-Eyes’ who has the courage to chortle in such a situation.

“This is the first time I heard you say that, I am proud of you!” she yelps, stopping her laughter, letting it be subsided and replaced by a serious facade she has been wearing more and more since she became the Commander.

That is, until she feels a warm pressure on her chest, just above her heart, that pulsating vital organ she, literally and metaphorically, is just about to sacrifice.

She only then notices that sensation came from Levi’s hand, able now to feel her heartbeat. Hanji stares at him, but his face points at the ground, not allowing her to read it properly.

He slowly leaves her there, as silent as a little unconscious butterfly landing on a flower. Hanji stays still, surprised for a second, her chest now suddenly cold.

Now more than ever, the selfish part of her still craves to go back to that time in the woods, when she asked him to stay there with her, forever, peacefully. She still wishes they both would have followed that coward, but so appealing path. Hanji almost lets her mind wander about a future that could only exist in her dreams, one where they both aren't a part of this war, aren't in danger. One where they live together, happily.

But she is still aware she would have regretted it, and she is only grateful Levi was able to call her out for it.

She then gives him a final smile and, even though he is giving her his back, Hanji is sure Levi knows she is giving him her last, huge grin.

Then, the 14th Commander of the Survey Corps doesn’t have any hesitation when she starts running, screaming in the air, almost deaf to all her companions’ pleas.

She has always been more of a strategist than a fighter, but she still can hold her own against those titans she loved to analyse. It is the last occasion to come off with a cool act and put her skills to use.

It was time for her last show and she wants it to be spectacular.

Even if now she knows she is approaching her end.

Grasping her new invention, she flies into the hair, the maneuver gears kicking in just as much as her pounding heart.

She feels the adrenaline burning her in the same way the heat radiating from her target does, starting to peel her skin off. 

But she remains strong.

And that’s when she uses her last creation, the thunderspear.

She prays, all of her body burning alive, that it will hit its target.

It does.

One colossal titan falls, and even if that doesn’t ease the pain, it reassures her she is truly doing the best she can.

She eyes her friends who are still trying to repair the damage of the plane. They are far, far away. She just hopes they will succeed.

Drawing her dual blades, she dives, her flesh detaching faster from her bones. The pain is now even worse than that time she lost her eye.

Hanji lands on one Colossal Titan’s neck, making it fall like her skin is doing at the same time, the heat making her as dizzy and tired as ever before.

She is able to do the same with another one, avoiding its hand which tried to crush her with brute force. 

She is smouldering fast, her breath is ragged. She is aware her next enemy will be her last.

Changing her damaged blades with a new pair, she spins and twirls, vaulting in the air, like a fairy strangely set on fire.

She has always loved the sensation of vaulting in the air, so she melts in that last moment of lively sky freedom. 

She then falls on the last target’s vulnerable spot, while both the pray and the predator ‒ who knows which one is which? ‒ scream in pain.

Hanji feels only as if little flames are coursing through her whole body, setting it ablaze. But she still stares in awe at those she refuses to call monsters, loving them just as much as that time she let one of their heads roll on the ground.

“Ah… titans really are wonderful.”

And that’s how the Commander falls. One could have sworn to see a smile even in her last moments. 

Hanji’s ears seem to perceive, as a goodbye, Onyankopon and the 104th squad members’ cries and a deep, whispered ‘Later, Hanji’.

The most selfish part of her wants to truly meet him again as soon as possible. She already misses her short, grumpy man.

But her heart hopes Levi, who became so dear to her, will survive and open that teashop he so desired.

Then, only black remains.

⚚⚛⚚

  
  


Hanji doesn’t truly know if she feels her body lighter or heavier than before.

At the beginning, she even doubts she died at all, but watching her surroundings, she finds her answer.

“You did a good job, Hanji” Erwin greets her after turning around.

She studies him and all the other companions she left behind and finally found again. Nanaba, Mike, Moblit who helps her stand up… they are all there, their smiles the ones that both hunted and reassured her in her dreams. They are now together in the afterlife.

“Oh, I guess I did well, then!” she smirks, her fist up in the air, cheering. She feels even more alive than before. “Even though it was hard being a Commander… damn, that stupid Eren!”

Erwin smiles reassuringly, patting her shoulder with his remaining hand.

“I’ll slowly listen to your story.”

She smiles again after that, her eyes shining. They truly have all the time in the world now.

And that’s when it strikes her. She had been wrong.

When she went and sacrificed herself, she wasn’t approaching her end.

Hanji was closer and closer to that so craved peace. 

She reached a new beginning.

**Author's Note:**

> I... honestly don't know what to say.
> 
> Hanji has always been my favorite character in SNK, and when I saw the spoilers, I felt so hurt. I decided I wanted to do something for her birthday, but the only thing I could focus on was the chapter and so... this retelling of it came out.
> 
> I know it isn't anything special - I am sure someone else already did it and way better than me - but my hands craved to write this little thing and so, here I am.
> 
> Of course, since the chapter isn't out yet, this isn't 100% accurate, but I prefer it this way. I think it conveys my emotions more.
> 
> Happy Birthday again to my Queen, she deserves the world.
> 
> As always, thanks to all the ones who will read this 'till the end, leave kudos and maybe a comment. I just hope this was an enjoyable read.
> 
> Annabeth.
> 
> P.S for all the ones waiting for an "Anima et Atramentum" update, it will come soon... hopefully.


End file.
